One day, a father and his rich family took his son to a trip to the country with the firm purpose to show him how poor people can be. They spent a day and a night in the farm of a very poor family.

When they got back from their trip the father asked his son, "How was the trip?"

"Very good Dad!," The son replied.

"Did you see how poor people can be?," the father asked.

"Yeah!" his son said.

"And what did you learn?," the father asked again.

The son answered, " Well, I learned that....

I saw that we have a dog at home,

and they have four.

<

We have a pool that reaches

to the middle of the garden,

they have a creek that has no end.

We have imported lamps in the garden,

they have the stars.

Our patio reaches to the front yard,

they have a whole horizon."

When the little boy was finishing, his father was speechless.

His son added,

"Thanks Dad for showing me how poor we are!"

If you have love, friends, family, health, good humor and a positive attitude towards life you've got everything! You can't buy any of these things, but still, you can have all the material possessions you can imagine, provisions for the future, etc., but if you are poor of spirit, you have nothing!

Isn't it true that ...

it all depends on the way you look at things?

Labels: life, life lessons, lifestyle

posted by pinay freestyle @ 1:56 AM [[ 0 comments ]]

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like a theatrical piece seen in a broadway play or a scene in a tear-jerking movie production, life is a showmanship poured with a labyrinthe of mystifying dramas. my meandering life existence for the past few weeks leaves me exhausted. its’ intricate unending complications are becoming laboriously unbearable. almost daily, i am faced with problematic dillemmas. troublesome journeys take an immense toll on me causing unmanageable relationships with my lovedones, peers, and even myself.

today, after yet another demanding encounter last night that resulted in fuming argument, i found myself staring at my own reflection in the mirror. my chinky eyes manifested a sleepless tearful night with obvious puffiness. the skin that circles under my eyebags and my eyelids are peeling and a little red from rubbing it too much that i obtained from wiping my tears rigoriously. i wanted to smile instead i displayed a sorrowful frown.

the urge to weep again arises but i kept it composed. alternatively, i stared at my blank face. silently in my head, i started a conversation with that woman i see infront of the mirror. the array of painful events suddenly rewinded and recalled. the anxious concerns came pouring in and rationalizing scrutiny. there are a vast of negative critiques to identify. there are summons of pin pointing blames. there are intriguing questions calling for answers…most of which starts with “why?.” yet, i forced to ignore that agenda. it was not my desire to let the tears fall again this time.

in leui, i directed the serious ”discussion” to import of unwavering strength, to give in to account of hope, and to chronicle and remind myself to hold on to faith. i desired this consultation to be a journey to heal, to forgive and eventually to forget.

so the dialogues went like these...

always know that there are those whose love and
understanding will always be there, even when you feel most alone. there are the people who will love you even in your worse self, they will love you. never stop discovering. discover enough goodness in others to believe in this world of peace.

embrace and be thankful for simple gestures: a kind word, a reassuring touch, and a warm smile be yours every day of your life. and in return, may you give these gifts as well as receive them.

always believe and hold on to hope. remember the beauty of the sunshine when the life’s storm seems unending.

never stop loving. teach love to those who hate you and your family. love your enemies the most. let that love embrace you as you go out into the world. never stop learning. let the teachings of those people you admire and got inspired become part of you, so that you may call upon them.

always make a positive connection and never forget the people you have met along the way. remember that those whose lives you have touched and whose have touched yours are always a part of you, even if the encounters were less than you would have wished. it is the content of the encounter that is more important than the form.

do not become too concerned and obsessed with material matters, but instead place
immeasurable value on the goodness in your heart. remember... you can not
bring all these treasures in heaven. you can only bring your friends.

always be appreciative and productive. find pleasure in simple things. find time
each day to see beauty and love in the world around you. realize that each
person has limitless abilities, but recognize that each of us is different in our own way. what you feel you lack in the present may become one of your strengths in the future.

never stop dreaming and achieving and stop worrying. look at the future as
one filled with promise and possibility. be a sponge and absorb everything life
has to offer. learn to view everything as a worthwhile experience.

find YOURSELF. find enough inner strength to determine your own worth by yourself. do not be dependent on another’s judgment of your accomplishments. you know yourself better than anyone else.

despite the hurt…always believe in love. always believe there are people who care for you and love you as you are. so just be yourself. may you always be loved. may "mr. dimsum" always love you...despite of the times you say angry things at him. may he be patient and unchanging.

there may be testing trials…but remember that there are also victorious triumphs. and that the world awaits you…

Labels: hope, life, life lessons, my story

posted by pinay freestyle @ 12:45 AM [[ 0 comments ]]

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Labels: forgiveness, friendship, God, life, life lessons, LORD

posted by pinay freestyle @ 3:00 PM [[ 0 comments ]]

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Life is so cruel sometimes. We are under attack constantly and innocently. We suffer from other people's ridicules and false judgements. If you say anything, angry words are thrown back to you multiplied by ten. If you do not say anything, you are belittled and betrayed.

Truth is, I know I can fire back. I know I can do the same thing they do to us. I can open up old scandals and adevertise it. I can be angrier. I can attack them also. I can do many things to retaliate.

I can loose my fuse and I can fume in fury. I can pinpoint blames. I can start a fight. I can ignite a fire. I can destroy. I can damage. I can make it bigger and greater.

But really, I asked my self, "What good will it do to me?" I want to sleep feeling and thinking I did not hurt anyone. I do not like the feeling of stepping on other people's toes to put my self on a pedestal. And if I did my own share of mishap to anyone, I will be the first to admit my faults.

My mind suggests me to fight. Yet, my heart tells me something else. In my heart, I know, I only have two choices: to FORGIVE or NOT to forgive. So I choose to shut my mouth. I choose to drop the angst. I choose to be the water to kill the fire.

Revenge is better when you just let it go...ALL OF IT: the anger, the urge to fight back, the desire to create a fire. Revenge is better when you just simply raise the white flag up. They won the fight. I surrender.

I can be the devil's advocate. But I don't want to go in hell. I'm not claiming I am super perfect. I am not an angel. In fact, will NEVER be an angel. But I can be a better person than I was yesterday. In my daily life, that is my ultimate goal: to become a BETTER ME.

So I will start by saying...I forgive you...ALL OF YOU. And May my God forgive me also.

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"Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, 'Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?' Jesus answered, 'I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times." Matthew 18:21-22


The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.

--Mahatma Gandhi


Blessed are they which are persecuted for righteousness' sake: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are ye, when men shall revile you, and persecute you, and shall say all manner of evil against you falsely, for my sake. Rejoice, and be exceeding glad: for great is your reward in heaven: for so persecuted they the prophets which were before you. Matthew 5:10-12


But I say unto you, love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you; That ye may be the children of your Father which is in heaven: for he maketh his sun to rise on the evil and on the good, and sendeth rain on the just and on the unjust . Matthew 5:44,45


PRAYER:
My Lord, Amidst our darkness, our everyday battles, our desire to anger, stay with us. Keep us calm and collected. Give us the strength to succumb it all and let it all go. I pray that our enemies, the people who hurt us and betrayed us, will find enlightenment and an open heart. In the bible, YOU taught us to love our enemies despite their persecutions towards us, to throw bread at them when they throw rocks at us, to forgive their trespasses, to love them more at these moments. You said it is the only way YOU will also forgive us from our sins. So In Your Name, I am forgiving them. Guide them and help them. May you keep them and bless them. Sorry for our sins. Have mercy on us. We asked you these through God the Father...AMEN.

Labels: forgiveness, life, life lessons, spiritual reveries

posted by pinay freestyle @ 7:46 PM [[ 0 comments ]]

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i contemplate to decipher and describe the twinge and torment that assailed on us. fiery careless words of others lambasted my lovedones like flaying bullwhips slapped on the backs and rears, with its sharp edge tailed knots and metalled stars tore the skin and flesh of the punished. their scorching balls of hatred thrown directly at us igniting our preserved dignities into blowtorch flames into charred ashes. we walked away and turned our backs from pursuing these battles but they pulled the trigger of loaded guns of lies, propelled and launched at us execution style.

i wanted to fight back. i could have interferred and blocked their merciless whipping with my strong wooden knight shields. that way they can also experience the sharpness of the bullwhips blades planted on their skin. i could have caught the balls of fury. i could have created a bigger ball and threw it back to them so they know how it felt like to be ignited in flame. i could have dispatch a rifle myself, i could have fling it towards the opposite direction, and blast it off to them with a bigger bang. i could have made a gigantic explosion.

the pain bursting in my heart, the multiplying damaging words they threw at us, the dishonest accusations, their denial to the truth, i probably would have. the burning desire within me tells me to defend my lovedones also, to straighten up the matter, to tell their own odors, too... i knew i could have...i could have done that easily. i wanted to. i would have. i could have...
but i decided NOT to do it.

with all my might, with all my remaining control, with my head bowed down, with my knees kneeled on the floor, with tears flowing down from my eyes, with my hands in praying position...i asked the Lord to forgive my evil thoughts and to purify my heart instead. with my humbled heart, i asked for His mercy. i asked for His blessing. i asked Him for strength.

perhaps...my revenge...is in His will. my revenge is to repent...to understand them more no matter how much it hurts. my mom and dad taught me to throw bread when they hit me with rocks. the bible said to love your enemies like your neighbors no matter how much they betrayed you, despite the lasting wounds that turned to scars they left you.

a friend once reminded me, "we are built by God not to shrink down into less version of ourselves. we are built by God to blossom into more. "

perhaps...my greatest revenge to their angry words...is to forgive with an open heart and with open arms.

and so HELP ME, GOD.

Psalm 23
A psalm of David.

1 The LORD is my shepherd,
I shall not be in want.

2 He makes me lie down in green pastures,
He leads me beside quiet waters,

3 He restores my soul.
He guides me in paths of righteousness
for His name's sake.

4 Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,
I will fear no evil, for You are with me;
Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.

5 You prepare a table before me
in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil;
my cup overflows.

6 Surely goodness and love will follow me
all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the LORD
forever.

"We are pressed on every side by troubles,
BUT we are NOT crushed and broken.
We are perplexed,
BUT we DO NOT give up and quit.
We are hunted down,
but God NEVER abandons us.
We get knocked down,
BUT we get up again and keep going."

2 Corinthians 4:8-9

Deuteronomy 32:11

Psalm 139

For the director of music. Of David. A psalm.

1 O LORD, you have searched me and you know me.






"Like an eagle that stirs up its nest,
That hovers over its young,
He spread His wings and caught them,
He carried them on His pinions."

Deuteronomy 32:11

"My brethen, count it all joys
when you fall into various trials,
knowing that that the testing
of your faith produces patience.
But let patience have its perfect work,
that you may be perfect and complete;
lacking nothing. "

James 1:2-4

God said to me, " my grace is sufficient for you; fo rmy power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore, I will boast all more gladly about my weakness so that Christ's power may rest upon me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

2 Corinthians 12:9-10

"Be glad! There is a wonderful joy ahead!
Eventhough it is necessary for you
to endure many trials for a while.
These trials are only for a while.
These are only to test your faith,
to show that it is strong and pure.
It is being tested as fire tests and purifies gold
---Your faith is far more precious than gold."

1 Peter 1:6-7

"God's loyal love could not have run out.
God's merciful love could not have dried up.
They are created new every morning.
How great is your faithfulness!"

Lamentations 3:22-23

"All things work together for those who love God; to those who are called according to His purpose."

Romans 8:28

Psalm 139

For the director of music.

Of David.

A psalm.

1 O LORD, you have searched me

and you know me.

2 You know when I sit and when I rise;

you perceive my thoughts from afar.

3 You discern my going out and my lying down;

you are familiar with all my ways.

4 Before a word is on my tongue

you know it completely, O LORD.

5 You hem me in—behind and before;

you have laid your hand upon me.

6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,

too lofty for me to attain.

7 Where can I go from your Spirit?

Where can I flee from your presence?

8 If I go up to the heavens, you are there;

if I make my bed in the depths, you are there.

9 If I rise on the wings of the dawn,

if I settle on the far side of the sea,

10 even there your hand will guide me,

your right hand will hold me fast.

11 If I say, "Surely the darkness will hide me

and the light become night around me,"

12 even the darkness will not be dark to you;

the night will shine like the day,

for darkness is as light to you.

13 For you created my inmost being;

you knit me together in my mother's womb.

14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;

your works are wonderful,

I know that full well.

15 My frame was not hidden from you

when I was made in the secret place.

When I was woven together in the depths of the earth,

16 your eyes saw my unformed body.

All the days ordained for me

were written in your book

before one of them came to be.

17 How precious to me are your thoughts, O God!

How vast is the sum of them!

18 Were I to count them,

they would outnumber the grains of sand.

When I awake,

I am still with you.

19 If only you would slay the wicked, O God!

Away from me, you bloodthirsty men!

20 They speak of you with evil intent;

your adversaries misuse your name.

21 Do I not hate those who hate you, O LORD,

and abhor those who rise up against you?

22 I have nothing but hatred for them;

I count them my enemies.

23 Search me, O God, and know my heart;

test me and know my anxious thoughts.

24 See if there is any offensive way in me,

and lead me in the way everlasting.

Labels: forgiveness, life lessons, LORD

posted by pinay freestyle @ 12:21 AM [[ 0 comments ]]

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rough, rugged, and rocky: sometimes, my life is like toling a high, rigid, and stony mountain. its' intricate uphills and perplexing downhills can be wearisome. often, i disguise what i feel inside. in a crowd, i stand out as i fascinate them with my wit & humor. everyone laughs out loud. behind those convincing giggles, an artificial smile covered my hidden despair. melancholic sadness hides in my teary eyes. yes, i'm in pretention and no one is aware.

secluded, i seeked solace in my quiet solitude. despite my roaring strength and relentless perseverance, i'm gullible to moments of powerlessness and weakness. in my attempts to be numb and impenetrable, i slowly lose my stiff self. wimpy and frail, i sink low, drowning in my own ocean of glooming blues. there, i weeped my close-mouthed woes for hours.

my own life's telenovela is concealed. i guess, no one would ever see. no one would contemplate and know me completely. i wimphered my outcries privately. in fascade, i masked my deep sorrows. as much as possible, i kept my intriguing layers out of sight.

i'm like an onion. you have to peel off the layers to discover the real me. i might have chosen to be confidential and complicated . but i am a mere human. i can feel. i can see. i love. i give. i hurt. i forgive. i forget. i lament. when i am hurt, i sob my barrels of tears.

in my transitory quarantine, i found a reliable companion. though drench in my soggy tears, my fluffy, spongy pillow gave me soothing comfort. i hugged , i cuddled, i snuggled my saturated pillow so tight. dreaming and wishing, it was your strong arms wrapped around me, my pillow seems to warm me in my chilly nights.

only my wet soaked pillow heard when my heartaching agony is screaming. the painful heart
often ignored. the watery eyes often unseen. only my pillow will attest to the abundant tear drops i wailed over you as you said you are unhappy.

undisclosed, weeping remains hidden from a view. oh my...those persistent tears lurk on my pillow. casted, my woes extend into dark depression. unceasing & voiceless, i cry in unspoken still of silence. quietly, i mummed my unuttered prayer,"my Lord, please provide me with vital stamina to sustain firmess in my times of frailty..."

yet, you left. you claim that you do not make me happy. how do you know that? have you seen my eyes? my joyless tears remain unnoticed. do you feel what my heart is saying? it is aching. my mournful yearning was once again unsuccessful. yet and again, i am heavy hearted. downcasted, i drenched my pillow with tears as i force myself to sleep.

Labels: life lessons, love

posted by pinay freestyle @ 2:24 AM [[ 0 comments ]]

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like the color yellow traffic light, i wait for my turn for the life's traffic light to go green. i scribbled words of mixed emotions: indescribable rollercoaster feelings of being in love and loving back, awkwardness of losing a trusted best friend due to self proclaimed ego, standing strong through the storms of recovery, missing the experience of the normalcy of life. lately, life has been on a halt.

the past months has truly been a test of strength. my best friend and i kind of parted ways. i will nmot detail the arguement. but let's face it, i am truly hurt. i've decicated my 13 years of friendship with her. and despite my anguish, i still worry and think about her. i stilll pray that God protects her and guides her. and that she'll forgive me for whatever harshness i've said. yeah, i have other friends. in fact, i have a lot of friends. but still, life is not the same not having her around. but for right now, life must go on.

physical recovery from an injury is somewhat easy. but the emotional and mental complications along with it is difficult. i am recovering from a long complicated injury that seems to get worse each time i am lying on a MRI machine as specialist detected more damage. words like 'nerve damage,' 'complications,' have been somewhat of a norm. narcotics, muscle and nerve relaxants have been my companion when the physical pain arise. but insomnia kicks in at night and you start thinking. how many days of idleness have passed you by due to all of this? my life of 2 hours sleep a day before is gone. i could have done a million things from these wasted recovery days. this idleness is a killer. and it gets worse as the day goes by.

for most part, love is unexplainable. most of the times, it is wonderful like the cherry on top of the sundae. sometimes, very rare, i taste a bit of tartly sourness like an unripe fruit. no one has loved me like "he" loves me. he is, by far, the greatest man i have dated beyond my wildest dream. who shows up in my house with an iced hazelnut coffee just because he knew i would love that? who takes me to latenight walks on the beach just because he knew i would enjoy that? who goes swimming with me eventhough he admits he's not a great swimmer just so i wouldn't be alone in the siwmming pool? my love does that for me...JUST BECAUSE.

but love isn't all sunshine and roses. we deal with miscommunicating. we say things we don't mean but have said it anyway and hurt each other. sometimes, a mere joke is taken too seriously that you unknowingly pained his ego and his heart. sometimes, i forget how lucky i am and i forget to appreciate all the awesome things and experiences he shares with me. i tell him many times, i am not perfect. i admit i am wrong and i say i am sorry. but i know, apologizing sometimes is not good enough to erase the damage i have done. yet, he forgives me. yet, he loves me.

i can't predict what life will bring me. i can't foretell what stories will come up next or who are the people i will cross path with. in this make believe world of 'fakes," i am simply struggling to be ME, the original. all i know for sure is, this is MY life. and as life hits me with my life's episode, i will just absorb it, writing stories of my life, one moment at a time. i can't do anything with what life gives...there's nowhere to go but to go on, savor it, live it and then tell it.

Labels: friendship, life, life lessons, love, strength

posted by pinay freestyle @ 11:54 AM [[ 0 comments ]]

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[i slept crying last night. perhaps, life has been a little too harsh on me. but it is okay. i can be anything and i can do anything if i set my heart and mind into accomplishing something. and the miniscule trials i undergo, i can manage to tackle it all. i just need time, focus and my determined faith.

this morning i woke up at 3:44 am. i attempted to go back to sleep. but nothing can make me snooze. i watched as the morning sun rays come alive. the twirps of the birds singing to me on my window. the light beach breeze of the wind flowed through my curtained window.
in my head.

with my eyes closed, i made up a prayer in my head. tears fells from my eyes, and i just prayed. i know, we can't have all the great days. but today can certainly be a good one. ]

Labels: life, life lessons, LORD

posted by pinay freestyle @ 6:47 AM [[ 0 comments ]]

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"ssshhh..."

i shut my loud mouth and let my mind and my heart do all the talking.

awake at 4 am, i talked to myself.

please, make the anger subside.
please, tell the hurt to go away.
please, erase the pain.
please, just forgive.
please, just....
please..JUST LOVE.

i will do that.

but first....

let me have my time to think things through...
i need my moment of solitude and silence to get there...

let me have my space to breath...
i need to vent...life is suffocating me lately.

let me be ME...
i can't be someone who i AM NOT.

let me LOVE ME again..
and i will do the rest.

Labels: life, life lessons, love

posted by pinay freestyle @ 6:35 AM [[ 0 comments ]]

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just when i thought i got the gripped of things,
just when i was getting the hang of it all,
life decides it needs to "shake things up"
gave me my own earth quake.

i tried to hold everything together securely...
...give SO MUCH of myself to "others,"
...deal with life's inevitable stresses and challenges patiently,
...share and not ask anything in return,
...understand things i DO NOT completely understand,
...love with all my heart despite of...[fill in the blanks],

but i guess, sometimes, doing all of it all is just NOT enough.

Labels: life lessons

posted by pinay freestyle @ 6:25 AM [[ 0 comments ]]

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Labels: believe, encouragement, hope, life, life lessons

posted by pinay freestyle @ 2:15 AM [[ 0 comments ]]

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Labels: life, life lessons

posted by pinay freestyle @ 6:35 PM [[ 0 comments ]]

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