"ms. congeniality"
last night, i told albert ( the famous AB) that i was bummed out. ...I said one of them days.....so i was whining and whining and complaining then we ventured out to this conversation.
albert: do you want to watch
your movie?
len: huh? what movie?
albert: don't you remember? 6 years ago?
[i'm thinking..but really i'm not interested...not a clue]
len: remember what? i just know that i met you 6 years ago.
albert: you don't even remember? the first mobie we watch on "our blockbuster night" was " ms. congeniality" with sandra bullock. i always think of you when i watch that movie. well, there's a part two to that movie so i was wondering if you want to see me when it comex out.
[i smiled....wow, how can he even recall?]
len: how can you remember that? it's been so long you know.
albert : well, i can remember a lot of things. i can remember that you ordered strawberry milkshake at denny's at 4 am when we first went out to eat. then the first movie we ever saw together at the movie theatre was "S>W>A>T." and we watched it at the grove at 11 pm with their last full show. the first dinner we had was at sanamluang in panaroma city. you were wearing a black guess brand baby tee-shirt.
[all smiling....]
len: wow, albert. i never realized how much you remember. aww...i feel special. thank you.
albert: so are we watching "constantine" this weekend?
len: sure.
THE LETTERnote: sadly, han, my supposedly prince charming cheated on me and really,
IT IS OVER but I want to share the last story....who cares who reads this....
FIRST I FOUND OUT HE WAS CHEATING....and then i confronted him and i sent a nasty text reffering to the girl. the girl attacked me on han's site. whatever. i responded with this note on han's site.
FIRST EMAIL
Thursday, February 03, 2005
HAN READ THIS!!! Breaking my silence
{ I am typing this at work because I felt so hurt ]
For long, I succumbed everything. I swallowed the pain, the tears, the "wrong grammared" custs and words said about me by my ex Han after I finally found out last week that he has been flirting with a girl here on myspace under the named Krissel Aromin behind my back while he was with me. I have had it!!!So Mr Han Yin, I knwo you are reading this... I am not going to tolerate the unkindly utters towards me. It's funny, I was with you on January 8 and we even kissed on the rain....26 days after, which is now, I found out that you have been with her since New Year's day. That explains all those time you said "I am busy..." and that " I don't want to have anyone in my life right now." Now, tell me, Did I made that up? Those words came from your mouth. I am not going to stoop down your level nor speak against her misspelled and wrong grammared comments towards me. I had my time with you and that was it. Whatever you have now, GO. I told you what I felt on those texts. You said you wanted to be my friend but friends do NOt hurt each other. So by the time being, I think it is best that we do not have any connections at all. We had all our memories and I will always hold that close to my heart. Thank you for the time spent. Though I hurt now, I am over it. I feel that maybe, this has happened for a reason. As I said before, I am not going to say negative about you nor her. I hope you know me better than that:I was never like that. I went to this medical field to help people and I am not going to degrade myself by hurting other people. I told you this on the texts, I forgave you. Whatever it is, I am not holding grunges. I am nto just ready to be friends with you yet. Ieven told you I am happy for you. And I texted you that plese do not hurt her like you hurt me. As I mentioned, I hope youjust realized your wrong doings. I think I deserved some credit and respect because I had done nothing to you and et, you caused me so much heartache. I'll let the Lord take care of the punishments. That's what the conscience is for. Thank you for the time spent and the rest of the things ----things and moments that seemed meaningless now. Let's all move on.
AND THEN SHE RESPONDED WITH THIS EMAIL
( THIS EMAIL IS SENT as it was written by the sender--no changes whatsoever are made)
THE GIRL WROTE ME THIS ON THE EMAIL
i dint really mean wat i said... I dont know wat you and HAN had.. thats why i had a misunderstanding...all HAN told me was that he told you before he left LA that he just wanted too be friends.. i really shouldnt have said things like that would of hurt you coz im really not a mean person.... but when it comes too HAN's EX's im kinda upset with them... he tells me things that his old girlfriends use too do to him and i dont want that too happen again... but please accept my apologies.... In the beggining... i met HAN through a good friend of mine... but HAN and I were only friends.. HE had a girlfriend before we MET so i wasnt tryin too take him from no one... ive known him for 2 years and some... and i never get in on his relationships... but before i ever started talking too him i just got out of a bad relationship! but when me and han were talkin i told him that i just wanted too make friends... i really dint know that we were gonna hook up because he really dint like me online... so please dont think i was his cyber girlfriend... we were just good friends in the beggining... i dont want u to call me things like that and i dont wanna exchange any back to u.. but please dont believe in karma as well its too supersticious... bad things happens too everybody...just dont think negative... if love doesnt come your way then you get it later on in life... I'm only 18 and i just wanna be loved the right way... and i want to treat my man the right way without saying errors in my relationship... thats why HAN wants too be with me because everything that i tell him he wants the same too happen too him... i know all his Ex's say things too but its usually because theres no understanding and trust that was involve... i dont want you too think im a boyfriend steeler because really im not... Han and I just found each other... im sorry if things dint go your way... but i hope one day me and HAN will see u happy... thanks for reading and i totally understand your pain... because i went through that everytime i was with the wrong guy...
[MY COMMENT ::: IM NOT GOING TO COMMENT]
I SENT THIS IN RESPONSE TO THE EMAIL ABOVE
SEND THIS LETTER IN RESPOND TO HER LETTER
Dear Krissel,
I meant no harm when I texted Han. I was upset at the timehow he handled this whole issue. When he went to Maine, we were working things out. He was still saying I love you and this and that. Wehn he went back, we saw each other almost eveyrday of the week whenever I am free . We kissed here and there. I asked him to work things out wiht me and he said that he DID not want anyone anymore in his life. I understood his desoire to better himslef and that was the main thing he excused about not having a girl. I even asked him to be a honest with me that when he find someone new and then tell me so I won't be wondering all my life. I asked him this several times. I insisted that we be honest. In fact, I talked to hjim last week and I asked him the same thing and he denied that he even had a girl he liked.
We agreed to be friends then but I thought he loved me like he said he did. We were trying to make it work--work in progress. I was with him three or two weeks ago and we kissed again. With all these events, you might be thinking we were together. There was one tiem when we were at Spires (some restauirant in Long Beach )couple weeks ago and a friend of his called but he was low on minutes so he used my cell. and HIs friend asked him whose cell phoen that was and he claimed, " I am calling you from MY girl's cell phone."Is this the implication of a relationship that was over? It seemed healthy to me. If you were in my position, you would probably question a lot of things. Things that were still in my mind now, Perhaps, things I will never get the answer. But I guess, the Lord has it's way of saying things to me. And I found out all about you. Now, It's a good thing. At least I found out.
I don't know why. To tell you the truth, I think I would feel a whole lot better right now if he has told me straight up that he had someone new and then that would give me reason to move completely.I would have accepted that wholeheartedly. I am an open person about a lot of things. I have been open to Han about my life. I am not ONE of the exes that has hurt him. You can asked him that. I'd like to think I was once an angel who fixed his broken heart. The Lord knows I have done nothing but good to him. Han knows that. If he had talked shit behind my back, then it's his conscience he should be concerned about.
I am not what you think I am. I had a wild and crazy past . But I know what I want and I am determined to achieve my dreams. I am a fun loving, generous,down to earth , I-am-willing -to -help kind of girl. I hope I have proven that to Han. I don't want any troubl;e. If you were to asked my friends and peers now, they would me as the party girl whose wacky and crazy and a confessed workaholic in the morning. More yet, a devoted friend who will never leave their side NO MATTER WHAT happens in their life. I have proven that to a lot of people: most of which has become my closest and bestest friends.
What do I want out of all of these? NOthing. I only asked Han to fessed up but it's too late now,. I demanded an apology but nothing came out. In fact, he was in denial. But it is okay. Between me and Han, he knows the truth. He knows what he did. I believed in karma which is the golden rule " Be careful what you do to others because it will come back to you." I don't want to make him feel bad. But he created his own ghost that will haunt him and only him can make it go away. I wish each and every time he looked at his Buddha on his necklace, he would feel a little bit giulty and ask for forgiveness. That's the only way the Buddha forgives you. When you learn to ask for an apology and actually admit to your shortcomings.
With all these said, I am ending this letter up with a thank you for answering my email. I hope you guys are happy. I told Han that he should take care of you and do not hurt you like he has hurt me. . I remembered before reading something that stated that "Love is when you know that the person you loved has someone new and yet, you tell him " I am happy for you." It is the willing ness to let go becaise wherever he is happy, you should be happy for himthis drama. This angel; might have lost one of her wings but I guarantee you that I will fly again. The Lord has beter plans for me. Whena nd where? who knows? Right now, the important thign is that I am able to let without any grunges or anger in mt body. I am able to fogive and wishWEll, I am lettin g go with a farewell wish that I wish you both the happiness you longed for. I hope you really fo find that in each toehr.
. If you need to talk to me feel free to call me on ,my cell @ ********** I am over this drama. The important thing is that I am able to let go without any anger in my heart. I ahave decided to accept this ocurrence in my life as it is and bid the person I loved before happineess evenm iif it was in exchanged of my own. . Han was probably not meant for me. The Lord has a better purpose. Who and where? Who knows? The lesson from all of these is to love like you have never been hurt. But let go if that means making the other person happy.
I wish you both well.and I mean that with all my heart. I'd like to come out of this mess clean and at peace and anger free. I think I have achived that.
So long. Norilen
MAFFI.....HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
Maffi, I was thinking of a song that will describe our friendship. Did I mention there was an enermous selection? Well, how can you even describe a decade of friendship? We've been through so much. Well, after al that searching, I came across Kenny Roger's 'THROUGH THE YEARS.' And what a best way to define our ten years of bonding and friendship! So HAPPY BIRTHDAY! I wish you a fulfilled life spiritually, mentally, emotionally, and physically. May you really find the meaning in true love through D and I pray for your accomplishment in your carreer. The Lord loves you dearly...and so do I. God Bless!
I can’t remember when you weren’t there
When I didn’t care for anyone but you
I swear we’ve been through everything there is
Can’t imagine anything we’ve missed
Can’t imagine anything the two of us can’t do
Through the year, you’ve never let me down
You turned my life around,
the sweetest days I’ve found I’ve found with you
... through the years
I’ve never been afraid,
I’ve loved the life we’ve made
And I’m so glad I’ve stayed,
right here with youThrough the years
I can’t remember what I used to do
Who I trusted whom,
I listened to before
I swear you’ve taught me everything I know
Can’t imagine needing someone so
But through the years it seems to me
I need you more and more
Through the years,
through all the good and bad
I knew how much we had,
I’ve always been so glad
To be with you
... through the years
It’s better everyday,
you’ve kissed my tears away
As long as it’s okay,
I’ll stay with you
Through the years
Through the years,
when everything went wrong
Together we were strong,
I know that I belonged
Right here with you ...
through the years
I never had a doubt,
we’d always work things out
I’ve learned what love’s AND FRIEND SHIP is about,
by having youThrough the years
Through the years, you’ve never let me down
You’ve turned my life around,
the sweetest days I’ve foundI’ve found with you
... through the years
It’s better everyday,
you’ve wiped my tears away
As long as it’s okay,
I’ll stay with you
Through the years!
