Tuesday, April 22, 2003
DISCOVER ME

I see: glares.
I need: to go get cough medicine. ate norlits said i am coughing like a dog barfing.
I find: that I don’t want to answer this one
I want: to go to Hawaii for vacation SOON!
I have: a soar and itchy thoat with an irritating cough and a stomach ache.
I wish: i find mr. right...the good looking and faithful one.
I love: (d) "him." I love the rain,t oo.
I hate: the sunglares on my eyes.
I miss: Las Vegas and Maffi and Alyssa
I fear: nothing.
I feel: sick .
I hear:Ariel's (my shitzu) dog tag swayung from side to side.
I smell: LA's ( my brother) fresh baked brownies just out from the oven.
I crave: "chap-che" --- korean noodles.
I search: for a peace of mind...the need to be loved.
I wonder: if anyone is actually reading this. I wonder if "he's" thinking of me.
I regret: loving without any boundaries....it hurts more.

When was the last time you..
Smiled?: when i told maffi about jayson today.
Laughed?: when i was with jay last night and he laughed at how i ordered "bibimbab" from the korean restaurant. ( he said i pronounced it so funny like "~bee~beam~bop"
Cried?: last week when i wrote the card for maffi.
Bought something?: five minutes ago...i bought clothes and clothes and shoes and shoes. i was hiding it from my mom!!!!
Danced?: on my way home...in the car, i was swaying through the music in LA traffic.
Were sarcastic?: I don’t know. I’m rarely sarcastic.
Kissed someone?: last one was AB.
Talked to an ex?: mikee---from jersey.
Watched your favorite movie?: two months ago, i watched "up close and personal" but hal way through the movie, i stopped. it reminds me of ron.
Had a nightmare?: rarely.


What was the ...
Last book you read?: In Full Bloom by caroline hwang
Last movie you saw?: A Man Apart
Last thing you had to drink?: water
Last time you showered?: this morning
Last thing you ate?: one slice of chicken teriyaki.


Do you..
Smoke?: nope
Do drugs?: nope
Have sex?: not at the moment...the docotr asked me if i was sexually active, i answered the same thing. LOL
Sleep with stuffed animals?: yes, unless i'm with ______.
Live in the moment?: most of the time. i have dweeling on my past and the future is too soon to think about.
Have a boyfriend/girlfriend?: in the middle of choosing.
Have a dream that keeps coming back?: yeah...and it's usually a premonition of some sort.
Play an instrument?: the piano and organ.
Remember your first love?: jayson c.
Still love him/her?: he'll always be special.
Read the newspaper?: online yes.
Have any gay or lesbian friends?: yes, many actually.
Believe in miracles?: yes.
Believe its possible to remain faithful forever?: yes, if the peroson chose too.
Consider yourself tolerant of others?: i think that's a part of my job.
Consider love a mistake?: sometimes....after i made a fool out of myself.
Like the taste of alcohol?: yeah. sex on the beach, baby!
Have a favorite candy?: sour skittles.
Believe in astrology?: NO. they are evry entertainign though.
Believe in magic?: yes.
Believe in God?: yes
Pray?: yes
Go to church?: yes
Have any secrets?: who doesn't?
Have any pets?: 2 dogs, one 4 month old shitzu ---Ariel and one poodle==Maxi
Go to or plan to go to college?: yes
Talk to strangers who instant message you?: never.
Wear hats?: only beanies when its cold outside or bad hair day.
Have any piercings?: yes
Have any tattoos?:i used to. gone now.
Hate yourself?: when i tolerate making a fool out my self.
Have an obsession?: shoes.!!!!!
Collect anything?: sentimental things ...that were given to me, ralph lauren bags!
Have a best friend?: maffi.
Wish on stars?: yes....always
Like your handwriting?: yes
Have any bad habits?: cleanign ym nails!!!
Care about looks?: yeah kind of. i have to look clean...and decent.
Believe in witches?: bitches, yeah wirches no.
Believe in ghosts?: yeah.


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MY SILENT REVERIES
writing is my passion. i created silent reveries years ago to vent out things i could not tell the world. it was my private, modern tech approach to scribbling my thoughts and emotions in a journal. in here, i can feely be who i am. i could cry my woes, i can love freely, i can grieve over a broken heart, i can celebrate the joys in my heart, i can rejoice with my accomplishments, i can tell stories of remarkable friendships and unforgettable connections i made with extraordinary people SECRETLY AND SILENTLY without worrying people might judge me. i hid under the name PINAY FREESTYLE.

but eventually, some people gained access to my secret place. so i opened my doors to them in the purpose that i could inspire them: to be better versions of themselves and to share themselves to the world. slowly, i embraced my readers as a part of my life. i welcomed the strange idea that my untold life stories and unconcealed revelations could be of help to others, to love and accept themselves as they are. and i, i came out from the animosity. i eventually became just the regular LEN - the nickname my family & friends call me.

i developed stories of love, of letting go, of falling in love all over again. i made great friendships. but if there's one thing i was particularly proud of, it was my undenying love for the LORD. i wrote and made soul searching, heart wrenching entries i entitled, "SPIRITUAL REVERIES" which you will find many here. it was my productive way to heal myself from twinge and while i am at it, i could also mend others spirits along the way and bring them back up to par with their faith and relationships with God. it has not stop there. it's still a constant journey.

and so, for as long as i can, i vowed to tell my memorable reflections,i have unmasked the hidden me. and the seeking and searching of life's meaning and purpose is not over. LIFE is a long road of discovering. and i still yet to discover many wonders of this world and satisfy my unending curiosity. but be warned. you can either love me or hate me. but i don't care. this is me: sripped and bare as i can be.

so i invite you into my chaotic unperfect world. join me in my whirlwind new travels of diving into the unknowns. let me share my life with you all over again. come in, as i tell you my SILENT REVERIES.

love,
len


DISCOVER ME: who is the lady behind the blogs?



"I want to have a personal light, the glow of oneself that comes from sheer willpower, the light of someone who has made important sacrifices in the name of things I think are important."

---Paulo Coelho's "Eleven Minutes"

my name is len. people always tend to judge me without discovering who i really am. i might look intimidating, a typical shop girl, and i act like a crazy party girl on the weekend. but i actually have brains. and i own an even bigger heart. the truth is, beyond the louis vuitton bags, beyond the lavish parties, the excessive passion to travel and the desire to get to know the world, if you got to know the REAL ME, i am really just a simple girl. my only desire is to be loved for who i am.

"









REACH ME if you want to get to know me better, if you want to share your thoughts, if you want to be my friend, don't hesitate: you can find me at


::EMAIL ME @ AOL::
:: EMAIL ME @ GMAIL
::FACEBOOK::
::AOL IM: XLENDCX::
::yahoo: YM::
::MYSPACE::
PREVIOUS POSTS
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conceal ME "don't say anything," this has been my...
rea-war-ction: tomorrow? read these: war in baghd...
salad bowl i have embraced silence lately. it was...
he loved me... he remarked, " i was like a jewel ...
LOVE?? i was talking to nicky ( ron's friend's gi...
UPDATES THIS WAS PUBLISHED!!! CHECK IT OUT HERE!...


DAILY DOSE OF ME my other blogs: in case, you're not tired of me yet =)


::GOOD THINGS::
life is all about appreciating the simple things

::YACKETY YACKS::
pinay chatter box: much ado about nothing =)

CONTRIBUTIONS articles and works i've done for other e-zines through the years




binibini.org: KEYCHAIN
binibini.org: FAREWELL
binibini.org: SA GITNA NG GABI

HABITUATE fellow bloggers who keeps me entertained and sane




::ernie::
::joyce::
::eric ahn::
::pammy::
::champuru::
::maldito/glenn::
::mica::
::tintin::
::batjay::
::rijah::
::carol::
::christine::

ADDICTION these are a few of my favorite things...




::louis vuitton::
::ugg australia::
::armani exchange::
::h & m::
::banana republic::
::target::
PAMPER ME in this stressful world, i need relaxation. places i hibernate to and hide away from the world. here are some of my favorite spots.




::olympic spa::
::pho siam thai spa::
:: raya spa::
::japanese garden::
::redondo beach::

FREQUENTS embracing life in los angeles: a day in a life in my shoes



::monte carlo cafe::
::THE GROVE::
::coffee bean::
::barnes and noble::
::starbucks::

GOBBLE GOBBLE [L.A.STYLE] food over matter los angeles style =)




::todai::
::sanamluang::
::hodori::
::alcove::
::portos::
::mayflower::
::tommy's::
::roscoe's::
::philippes::
::thai bbq::
::the pantry::
::pinks::
::koji's::
::kabuki::

QUERRIES i don't know everything. so these are the sites i go to answer my inquisitive inquiries, obtain html coldes, and upload my pictures.




::google::
::yahoo::
::ask::
::photobucket::
::blogger::

ARCHIVES