i have embraced silence lately. it was the best response for all the things life has given me. first was my finaly goodbye to ron. second is my dilemma at school ( i started a petition for a professor to be fired....she does not teach and she gets 9,000 monthly, NO...i don't think so) and then my own shares of family problems and stresses at work. i transferred school by the way. through it all, i remained quiet.
i spent a whole lot of hours locking myself in my room. sometimes, i stared at the ceiling for hours. other times, i am too tired to think so i sleep it all away. however, there were many times i could not sleep late at night. i have thought of ron so many times. most of the times, tears fell form my eyes. the pain is still too fresh and in great immense. the wound is still bleeding. and yet, i miss him. sometimes, i wish i have the perfect world of having everything and not worry about life too much. but then in that case, life would be meaningless.
without these countless miseries and challenges, my life would be nothing. these are the things that prove that i can handle anything. for instance, before, our house burned down. my ex boyfriend of four years, glenn, got a girl pregnant and had to marry the girl. that passed. for a while, i thought my life collapsed. i got back up on my feet. i met ron, we built a new house, i established a well paying job.
there is a rainbow in every storm and thunder. and the sun will shine. my life right now is not perfect. it will never be. someday, i will meet the right mate, someone who will take care of me and not break my heart. some day, i will be a doctor or a nurse practitioner devoting my time to cure and heal people. or perhaps, i can teach sharing myknowledge in nursing and science. someday, i will be able to help my siblings and my parents so they would not work as hard as they do now. someday......
i am grateful for the challenges. i thank god for the tearful nights and sad moments for these moments allowed me to rise above. i appreciate the times when i am alone because these were the times i reorganized my life. i thank my mom for the lectures because she opens my eyes to wisdom and knowledge of life ( somebody has to tell me to get back up!!!!!). i thank my poppa for always the wind beneath my wings. my brothers who adds humor and my sisters who keeps me sane. i am thank ful for my cousins for their undying support. and my friends for the company and love.
life is a salad bowl of different challenges. some bitter, some are sweet, some bearable, some are not, some are textured and some are soft. regardless, we need to swallow it because it does some good to our selves. i do nat have the comforts every one have. i do not have everything. but i have a family who loves me, i have a dream that i am working hard to achieve. through it all, i just need ot be thank ful. and not forget that the sun continues to shine tomorrow despite of the gloomy storms of today.
posted by pinay freestyle @ 12:22 PM
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