95% of men are.........
i don't know if it's me but i think i have been letting people invade and overpower my capacity to love. i thought i found that someone i have been looking for for a long time in F. but i think i expected too much from him. and now, the consequences has hit me terribly.
i feared for this moment. but i also realized this pain was minor compared through the torture glenn put me through. i mean, the scar is too shallow that it will heal...soon..well, it's healing now. it's just i feel like i just let him stepped on me AGAIN. and it seems that i have been putting myself in this position where i am always the one abused and used and i am hating myself for that.
why am i always making myself look like a fool? why am i taking risks that are not worthy? why is it it seems that i am always getting promises?
i really don't know. perhaps, my experiences speaks for itself....most of the men in this worlds are jerks...MOST. i should have listened to F. after all, he was the oen who told me, 95 % of men are JERKS and there's about 5% who are not. obviously, F fell on this category of jerks, er..let me rephrase that...ASSHOLES.
life is a journey. if this potential romance didn't work, it was probably for the better rather than i discover his "assholeness" while i was already in the relationship. it was best to know it early for my own benefit. perhaps, tita lulu was right when she said that there are certain things in life that aren't meant for us. and if it was, it will chase you. life is filled with destinies.. and frank cetainly wasn't part of mines. so we'll leave it that way.
i just wonder who is meant for me? because he is taking all these time to find me. while i'm going through all these experiences of haertaches waiting for him.
i can't wait until our world clashes.
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