bruiseless

(dedicated to someone very close to me. ate, this one's for you).

then there you are...now, a loving and a patient mother to your brilliant children, a great provider and a n intelligent grown woman who have passion for her profession...super woman, i may say, for tacklign all these responsibilties alone. i know you tried your best to be the best wife but it's not your fault why you can not have everything in life. obviously, there are many reasons. and you are not to be blame.

then i saw your bruises. red, purplish, almost dark colored bruises...all over your arm, perhaps, all over your body. i asked you several times,
"what's that?" and you would respond, " oh, richard was grabbing me. it's nothing." i see the bruises and the old scars... and i hurt. i am in pain vbecause you are special to me and he's hurting you...even more. i can't stand seeing you in this pain. i stared at your eyes as you continue to act dumb and defend "him." but you avoided my stares.

and you, richard, ahh, you are such an pathetic asshole. you uttered you can't be with her too long and yet , when your friends, your frat brothers, your co-workers would call, you would leave immediately and drink the night away with them. you complain you can't spend one hour of quality time with "her" and yet, ironically, you can spend hours beating up someone who is evidently weaker than you until she is helpless and filled with contusions. and when she begs you to stop, as coward as you are, you continue to not only fill her with more physical scars but emotional damage as well

what did she ever do to you? she has been wonderful to you. for twelve years, she has been faithful to you. she gave up the opportunity to live in america just for you. she worked endless hours here in the states, doing laborious hours of work just so you can finish college. she left her parents and siblings just so she can be with you. when she was pregnant, you cheate don her and she forgave you. she went through mental and emotional stress while she was pregnant. for nine months, she handled it on her own. she had her first baby and you were not there right her by her side even during her painstaking labor. now, she became the mother to your children, working 12 hours everyday and yet, provide enough time and caring for her family and yet, you never spare her a moment. with just little things, you lambasted and injured her inside and out. and yet, she remained tolerable to your beatings. she chose to keep quiet just so you can "look good" to the people around you. she disregarded her own pain, her sacrifices just for her family.

and the kids. there's that trauma in them. everytime, while you and her engaged into an argument or a fight, i see the innocent little boy hiding under the table...in the closet, or somewhere..anywhwere....just so he can't see you arguing. and the little girl, keeps crying...not knowing what to do. at such a young age, these children witnessed the unexplainable hatred, the battered mom, the cruelty from their dad. if only i can erase these memories of harshness in their eyes. it is emotionally and mentally damaging...especially that these children are tainted with colors of hate and seeing "hitting someone" seems "normal." this image will forever be marked in their minds...and i don't wnat that to happen. no, not to them. they have other things to worry about. they need to enjoy life, experience what it is like to be a kid...playing, ice cream, be loved...and taken care of but not violence. they do not need to witness the uproar of fury that you divert to their mother.

i read your letter today. word by word i read your letter. i read it twoce or even more. you mentioned you are finally leaving him. "YES." i said. seven years of torture has coem to an end. i am glad you are leaving his loser ass. it will be rough for the kids, as they adjust life without a father. it will be severely heavy on you as you carry the burden in fulfulling both roles of a mother and a father to them, supporting them financially, emotionally, mentally, spiritually. it will be extremely difficult for you to face each and every day being a single mom, and at the same time, being the provider, the explainer, the listener, the strength and the "light" and the "wall" of your home.

but nevertheless, i am so proud of you. it takes gigantic amount of guts to make this decision. for so many years, you were blind to his incapabilities as a partner and a father. you assumed he loved you that is why he was beating you. you blamed you deserved the scars because you weren't good enough as a mother and a wife to him and your children. you thought there was room for him to change because there were certain times he'd sayhe loved you. you said he loved you while the following days, he would pound and maul you to the floor, leaving you with black eyes and black scars... and he creates more deeper wound in your life. i am glad you finally had the courage and bravery to say, " this has got to stop. the torment is over. for my kids' sake."

it will not be easy along the way. but i will help you the most i can. i'll be here to help you no matter what, to let my little angels grow up in an environment that's healthy and loving and not with scars, bruises, and harm.

it is difficult to leave. but it's better for you to be alone and bruiseless rather than having him there and you are covered with bruises. i don't want to see that way. you are more than that. i admire you for the woman you are. just know, at all times, i am here for you and the children. who else will help out each other but us.?

i am here for you always. why wouldn't i be? i am your sister and i care for you deeply.

posted by pinay freestyle @ 8:59 PM

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