lately, i've been suffering those "i-miss-ron-so-much" attacks that it has affected both my eating and sleeping habits. my normal sleeping patterns decreased from eight hours to three hours. not only have i eaten less, but i also have skip two meals a day. for instance yesterday at work, i gave up two of my breaks and sat myself in the corner of the staff lounge and just think and contemplate of all these unberable emotions.
the other night, i talked to one of ron's friend's fiancee, keisha. and she mentioned how hard it is to be in this situation with ron (ron and i are dealing with a situation beyond our control and it will take a while before we find a solution because the answer does not come from us). she said she gets to see her fiancee almost every weekend. i told ron that i wanted that option, too. but things are setting us apart because it will be hard to see each other and then to think that we would not be with each other any longer than we want to because we have to face and attend to our separate goals and lives. nonetheless, keisha adviced me to hold on and be strong. strange because that's what i always tell ron whenever i leave. and then she added, "oh, by the way, ron told me to tell you that ' he loves you and misses you very much ' and for you to sleep early and eat before you sleep and for you take care of yourself."
i smiled.
after the longest 16 hours shift i had in the hospital yesterday, i could not wait to get home and just lock mysefl up in the room and sleep. first, i wanted to clear my mind off this stress. i also yearned to relax my body and my soul. driving home, i thought of ron again. i wonder if he's thinking of me and going insane like me thinking of him. i wonder. pissed off because i could not really figure out any answer, i stepped on the gas pedal and then sped up to go home so i can just sleep, forget about eating, i'll just sleep.
when i got home, i rushed to my room, took a shower and then headed back to bed. but in between my sheets, was a piece of thick envelope and when i held it up, it was from ron. on the hand made card with both our names on it, was a simple reminder that he loved me and missed me. then a long letter which consists of "take-care-of-yourself" lecture. after reading it, i headed to the dining room. there was a beautiful flower arrangement. i said, " wow." and then my sister goes, " oh. that's for you. "
from my peasant, of course, and it stated, " for my highness with love. someone misses you smile. guess who?"
in awe and in unexplainable joy, i smiled. i needed that. last night, i went to sleep with the card right next to me. and i just woke up right now from that good night sleep.
posted by pinay freestyle @ 6:54 AM
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