appreciative

remember the guy i told you i admired? he's also the one i mentioned who was younger...well, we had the best conversation today. i don't know what indulged him to open up to me but he did. and i appreciate how he opened up his feelings despite the fact i knew he was hurt. his father suffered a stroke earlier and he's been having a hard time to deal with it. he admitted he cried. i revered at his sensitivity. not only does he brigtens up my day, he gives me consistent smiles. and i am contented with that.

i can relate to his situation because just two years ago, my own father suffered a heart stroke that left him walkign in a cane now. when "he" was telling me he wept, i began to feel this soft spot on him. usually, i would give him a hard time. but i felt as if i needed to cut him some slack today because he needs me more than i need his company to cheer me up.

in the midst of our emotional ventilation, i started crying. and he listened to me...just listened to my woes and frustrations...about my past, my dad's health, my house burned, my heavy burdens, my dreams, my shattered heart, the cheating guys. through it all, he just listened. i mean, i don't know. one thing i noticed with men is that all they do is "hear" and not "listen." hearing---hear it through one ear and goes to the other...whiel listening---hears with a heart. i appreciate his consideration and kindness. then he said, "wipe your tears, sweetie. you don't deserve to cry." and i wept more....because he amuse me...because...he's so nice to me and it's not fair that i am giving him a hard time when he, too needs to be comforted...because i think i am beginning to like him more than i should.

there are more to discover. perhaps, he can be the one...but i don't know yet. it depends on my heart and his, too. time will answer it all. well, he had to go. and even though i wanted to hug him...i simply said, "thank you. i really appreciate it."

TO: L. G. (that's his initials)...thank you for making my day. thank you for making me smile. =) even if you're the one who deserve the cheering up. someday, i will be able to open up to you as much as you have open up to me. someday, i will also be able to give you access to this blog so you 'll realize i do talk about you. for now, i'll keep smiling just for you. =)

posted by pinay freestyle @ 9:12 PM

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